Sunday, October 23, 2011
learning new ways
this post last week; I had been meaning to for a while but kept on putting it off. For most of my life, I had so many walls around me. Walls around my heart and spirit...sometimes even around my mind. It was a protective measure, a survival skill that no longer was needed but one that I held on to for dear life. All of that changed after Tara was born. As soon as I laid eyes on her...something deep inside me was born; the person I was meant to be all along. She birthed me as much as I birthed her. Maybe even more. All of my walls slowly came crumbling down. Just like that...a lifetime of defenses crumbled to dust. Here I stood, very naked and vulnerable and half scared to death. But...let me tell you a secret. I am learning new ways and it feels so damn good!! It feels holy and true and right and pure to be wide open like the sky. As generous as a tree...as naked and vulnerable as a newborn baby. I am learning new ways...and things are exactly as it is meant to be.