published!

I'm over the moon to be published in the current Artists' Cafe magazine!

Friends...I wrote an article about the power of art journaling, sharing our stories and standing in our truths. I have long believed in the power of storytelling as medicine. When I was still in my teens, I began art journaling before I even knew it was a thing. I simply began combining my  writing and drawing by accident and then discovered that it helped me. It was one of the tools I unknowingly used to survive my dysfunctional and abusive "family" of origin. There is an alchemy to combining our stories with art...it is storytelling from the soul. For me, it was a way to give voice to my experiences...my journals were bearing witness to what I experienced. It was a safe refuge for me to process some of the pain and to empower and validate my experiences.My earliest art journals literally became my lifeline to truth and sanity.

 This past year, as I have been entering a deeper phase of recovery, I once again find myself deeply drawn to the magic of art journaling. I hope you all have a chance to check out the article, friends...it's a 6 page spread where I completely pour out my heart and soul.

published!! (Somerset Studio Art Journaling mag, Autumn 2014)

 “We all begin the process before we are ready, before we are strong enough, before we know enough; we begin a dialogue with thoughts and feelings that both tickle and thunder within us. We respond before we know how to speak the language, before we know all the answers, and before we know exactly to whom we are speaking.” 
                                                                                                        - Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes
 Friends...I have some great news to share...I have been published in the Autumn issue of Somerset Studio Art Journaling mag!!!! I am so very very grateful to Amber Demien (editor) as well as the lovely ladies at Invincible Heart Co. for making this all come together.  I am so grateful and honored to have an 8 page spread! For me, art journaling is a sacred space to pour out all of my soul...all of my fears, insecurities, vulnerabilities as well as joys and happiness mingle on these pages and create a path to healing and creative expression. I never know what's going to emerge (and isn't that half the fun?).

The story behind this little "Spirit" journal is this right here...it was earlier on this year when I felt a deep pull toward both my creative life as well as full time mothering. While I knew that Tara was going to be starting full time Kinder in the fall and I would have plenty of time for art making then...it was still so difficult to put my creative life on hold. I think so many of us moms struggle with that. Anyways...I was contacted by the lovely ladies at Invincible Heart Co. and started working with their creative kit...oh my!!!! My creative juices were jump started and ...I poured all of it into this little journal. I turned toward my real life struggles...how my very ordinary life paled in comparison to other artists who were flying here and there to exotic locales to either teach or attend a workshop/retreat etc etc. How even though I was so very fortunate and grateful to witness my daughter growing, to spend this time with her...how another part of me yearned to have the time to create more...to blog more, to paint more, to write more. It was a continual struggle.

But through the very cathartic process of spilling my truth onto these pages...I found a path forward. I elevated my mundane reality to that which was worthy of inspiring my creativity. I started to see the whole rather than this one part of my journey...where all the strings + strands, all the people + experiences of our lives come together to form the beauty of the whole. I began to see that nothing, absolutely nothing, is ever lost. Everything has meaning and the seeds from which greater things will bloom...our stories, our art...our very lives. As I went through my pages...combining words and images I began to feel stronger, more whole...more empowered.

Almost...invincible:)
xxx

published (!!!), a rejection letter + forging new paths

 I am super excited, humbled and honored to be featured in the Summer 2013 Somerset Studio Gallery!!! It's one of my all time fave. creative mags for inspiration, techniques and eye candy. I am so very grateful to be given this opportunity! A huge thank you to all the folks who make this magazine possible...from the technical expertise to the photography to the 101 things (I can only imagine!!) that go into the production of this gorgeous magazine. And a special thank you to editor Jennifer Jackson Taylor for all your hard work. I hope you get to pick up a copy, friends...it's chock full of great stuff, I promise. 
*Also available in Canada!!!!

 I wrote this article many months ago and am loving the layout and feel!! It's all about how I turned a very frustrating period (think...creative block gone wild, moving in + deciding to stay!!!) into an opportunity for growth. I called it creating Soul Biographies...because I think all the work we do as creatives are ...just that! This isn't the best pic. but I just received a copy and couldn't wait to share!! Hate that reflective glare but...it's a full 5 page spread (p. 30-35) that I am so very proud of.

 Okay friends...now here's the flip side to all of my over the moon happiness!!! I also received  a rejection letter a few days ago that completely crushed me. Seriously. I fell apart in tears and ...caved into the imposter syndrome to the nth power and on and on. As rejection letters go...it was really very nice: sugary sweet and very polite. Along the lines of we love your work and appreciate your creative energy etc etc. But still...I fell apart. I took it personally. I was crushed. I know it's par for the course. I know it's part and parcel of creative life. Of life, for that matter!!! But...it hurt so much! And I was depressed and losing faith in mySELF. In my work. In my path. I crushed up the letter...and then straightened it out. Then crushed it up again...on and on. A little silly now??? maybe...but there you have it:) And sure...I indulged in a healthy dose of self pity, tears + chocolate...

Then I came across this poem:
"I go where I love and where I am loved,
into the snow:
I go to the things I love
with no thought of duty or pity"  -H.D. The Flowering of the Rod

 And I realized...I love painting!!!! I love opening jars of paint, love looking at paint...dipping paintbrush and fingers into colors...vermillion, ochres....magentas. Love creating!!!!! Love bringing from...nothing...something. I love my creative life...with all of it's frustrations and tears. With all of the insecurities and deep rooted anxieties. With all the joy + love + excitements + surprises. I lean into all of it with the deepest longings of my deepest heart. So...it's not really about achieving all of my goals, or getting published (although that is super duper sweet!) or or or...It's about knowing that I am living my life exactly the way  want to...on my own terms. It's about putting one foot in front of the other...daring greatly (both my word for the year and a book that I adore) along the way. It's about tossing my hat in the ring, living authentically and doing my best. And with that...I feel deeply in awe and full of gratitude that I actually get to create.

I am ecstatic to get back to my studio table...to open up my jars of paint, turn on my music...with sunlight streaming through my windows....and put paint to canvas. I am forging new paths...creatively and otherwise and it feels great. Scary!!! But also...great; alive!!! Stepping out of my comfort zone and... into the unknown. Immersing mySELF in nature and light + music + books...poetry and writing. Artist dates and mothering and marriage. Allowing.
 xxx

art news...joy spilling over

                                                (Somerset Studio Gallery Winter 2012 )
My heart feels full and wide and deep with possibility and joy tonight. I'm published in the Winter 2012 Somerset Gallery...and I am full of happiness. Thank you Christine Olivarez, Jennifer Jackson Taylor and all the folks at Somerset...thank you, thank you, thank you ...for giving me a chance. I haven't been able to get my hands on a copy yet...but I am going to try every single Barnes and Noble this weekend!

When I think of how hard I have had to work-all of my life- simply to believe in mySELF, it makes me tearful and joyful all at once. There was a time when I couldn't claim my stories, my voice or my art. There was a  time when I couldn't even claim my psychic space...my very essence. But every tiny step of courage, bravery and truth-telling has led me to this very place. And for that...I am thankful...joy spilling over.