My He(ART)-Full Life

Sunday, July 15, 2012

resisting change

This past week I have been so frustrated with my art!!! I have been struggling with moving in a new direction and (for some strange reason) I have a compulsion to paint the same lady all the time!!! Does she have something to tell me?? Am I simply afraid to evolve artistically?? Am I stuck??? If someone knows what this all means...please tell me!!!  It seems like I take one step forward and then 5 steps back!
I think I feel comfortable painting the same way because its what I know. I trust that there is a path ahead but...I don't trust that I know the way. Anyhoo...
I decided to take a break from painting and get out into the world to be inspired, play and get some perspective. I came across this wonderful art exhibition called the Art Of the Dream. I loved how nothing made sense (or had to) and different visual perspectives were all presented simultaneously. It took my breath away and opened me up all at once. I especially love the painting with the woman holding the bowl with 3 white birds (upper right). Love all the circular motion.

I also managed to get some alone time with my journal, a book and a cup of tea. Writing unlocks so many mysteries + questions, don't you think? It's cathartic and replenishing all at once. Plus...I think that shortbread makes everything better; it's just one of those simple facts of life:)
And...puttered around in my garden...I planted a gazillion wildflower seeds a few months ago and it's so amazing to watch them grow and change every single day. Now...why can't I follow suite instead of digging in my heels and resisting change every step of the way??? Nature is such a brilliant teacher. Just wish I were a better student. sigh. xxx


Anonymous said...

so sympathise! i get a horrid restless feeling when a new direction is trying to break through, and nothing looks good enough and i miss the totally engaged feeling of the 'old' days, totally forgetting that this has happened before and will happen again! but you are doing all the right things - going and being in nature, checking out new art, playing with new materials, journalling...
i just took the liberty of pulling a sacred gardens card for you and this is what it said:
WATER BASIN the sacred feminine/grandmother ocean - a tsukubai/basin in the garden reminds us to wash our hands and mouth before entering a sacred space.
my interpretation would be to 'cleanse your palate',to do a ritual invoking Kuan-Yin chinese goddess of compassion, love, healing and acceptance to release the old with love and wash your hands and mouth to accept the new - and then to literally cleanse your palette and clean off the old colours, lay out clean paper/canvas and sit in a new position to work, eg kneel or stand or cross legged...
and see what comes ;)
maybe lakshmi will send a shower of gold for you :)
the deck is by elizabeth murray from pomegranate publishing and has been unavailable in britain for years, so i was thrilled to get one on amazon last week!
off to take my scary new direction!
all good wishes
dee @ birds sing artblog

SooZeQue said...

I don't think there is any issue with creating the same thing...but really each painting isn't exactly the same they all have a different look, feel. They have their similarities, but that makes them united as one. I wouldn't force the change I think it will happen when and IF it is ready.