are you listening?

" The way to maintain one's connection to the wild is to ask yourself what it is that you want. This is the sorting of the seed from the dirt. One of the most important discriminations we can make in this matter is the difference between things that beckon to us and things that call from our souls."
                                                                                                                -Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes

These past few weeks, as I have been searching for my painting style, I have been asking mySELF...what is calling me? My soul has been talking and I have been listening. Like so many many of us, I haven't always listened. There have been times in my life when I have ignored, stuffed down, shrugged off and dismissed...mySELF. Do you know what I mean? But no more...no more...no more. Life is just  too short and as I get older...uh! I mean wiser (more courageous!!! )...I find mySELF listening. Not that it is easy. It is really difficult finding the time, space and energy to balance motherhood, marriage, blogging, painting... but it is necessary. Here is what is calling me right now...

* my family...Tara and Tim are the center of my life. At this time...my most important task is to mother Tara. I want to fill her up with so much love...that she overflows. I want to respect her and listen to her and plant the seeds of raising a strong girl. I want to nurture my marriage and love this man who walks by my side on this journey. Right here, right now
*painting-searching deep deep inside of my soul and letting things flow. Pouring all of mySELF onto the canvas..."mistakes" and all.
*community-I have been meeting so many many amazing people that are nourishing me in ways I never thought possible...with acceptance, understanding and creativity. The world is opening up wide wide wide and I am finding my tribe..my sense of belonging. It feels like home.
*art journalling-right now I am strongly feeling the pull to experiment and delve deeper into this art form. There are so many things to try out...so much to learn!
*Being in the moment. Letting go of expectations while still setting goals and trying my best.
*Starting my exercise program again.

What is calling you? And more importantly, dear soul...are you listening?