Some days (
okay...every day!) it's difficult or impossible to find balance. Some days...it's difficult to just show up...with our best selves + our worst. There is no perfect pie in the sky, her life is better than mine, Utopian lala land out there.
So why do we compare, strive for and expect anything other than what is??? Why does that little seed of discontent sometimes grow into a tree of despair??
I am having a difficult time these days balancing everything. With Tara growing up so fast...I am experiencing how time is just slipping away at lightning speed. Right now..I would much rather spend time with her...eating breakfast in the sun...watching the birds...than be in my studio. I would much rather work in the garden, read a book, go for a walk with T&T (Tim and Tara!!) than paint. And...it's okay. There are cycles to creativity...and every part is equally important. I also realise (more than ever) that I am never going to get these years with Tara back...these years of having her all to myself before she goes off into the world. It makes me incredibly sad...but also grateful that I realise the opportunities right here, right now.
Of course...I will never give up my art + painting. Because that is an intrinsic part of me too. Part of my heart + soul
...it makes my spirit leap and fly and soar. So...it's all about honoring my life, my process and accepting where I am. This is the raw + the real of my life right now.
Just showing up (even when it's a struggle) with
all of me
(doubts, fears and hopes)...knowing + trusting that I will be
heard.
and accepted.
and loved.
Thank you. xxx
