"comfortable with uncertainty"

                                                    (on my easel right now)
Things are moving along so fast over here for us...we are loading up our first POD this weekend. So what that means is packing, packing and more packing!!! Everything is an absolute mess...with boxes everywhere. I have been painting these last few nights...because next week my studio gets packed up:( Just getting into my studio at night, after Tara goes to sleep, is such a breath of fresh air...grounding me and sustaining me right now. We have bought  a home...and while I am excited about that part of it...this is that in-between phase of complete uncertainty. Are we going to have good neighbors, are we going to make friends and become part of a community??? Is Tara going to be happy in our new home? Plus...I am going to miss all the people I have met here in Ca. this past year. Tara has awesome teachers and loves her classes. This has become her home for the past year; she is already upset about having to move. So...while there is so much excitement about getting settled...there is also a lot of trepidation; some fear and uncertainty. It seems fitting, then, that the book I am reading right now is called "Comfortable with Uncertainty" !!!! by Pema Chodron. Just started it...I bought it because of  a recommendation from Jane. The Universe has impeccable timing and, it seems, quite a sense of humor:)
***N.B.   My Etsy shop is closed and will re-open soon.

random this and that

(winter on the Ca. coast-a few weekends ago)

I can't believe that our year in California is almost at a close...it seems like we just got here!! I am wondering where all the time went to, why I didn't get together with the girls (Patty, Jane and Pat H. ) more often and how much Tara has grown. Is it just me or is it that as we get older time just flies by at lighting speed?? I also realise how much I have grown through blogging. These honest and deep connections that I have made with so many of you has sustained, nourished and supported me through some very difficult times. Thank you!! You know...before I started my blog about 2 years ago, I was a new mom coping with a lot of things. I was isolated, trying to cope with being a brand new mamma  and being bombarded with a lot of negativity that left me angry and spiraling into a depression. But once I took a leap of faith and plunged into this brand new world of the blogging community...my life literally changed!! I started to get a different perspective, become stronger and more mySELF. Now...with these few weeks ahead of me that  are filled with crazy packing, moving etc...my blog has become that much more important to me...a lifeline with connections, support and therapy...uh...I mean my creative outlet:)

Oh! and I came across this delicious poem last week...I have been thinking about it ever since. I wrote it down in my journal and love it to pieces.

"Moon marked and touched by sun

my magic is unwritten

    but when the sea turns back

    it will leave my shape behind "

                                         -from A Woman Speaks by Audre Lorde

I love Audre Lorde...her warrior/poet spirit touches me to my core. When she wrote her Cancer Journals she really worried that she wouldn't have time to complete her work...that she had left so much unwritten.

It inspires me to continue doing my work now while I am able. Just some random thoughts here and there. I hope you all  have a great day!!

Trusting the Journey

We are on the cusp of upheaval over here! It was such a rough weekend-especially for Tim. We worked so hard...packing and boxing and on and on! Getting very little sleep and just putting one foot in front of the other. Moving sucks-but this part...especially sucks! All the hard work, energy and time to break everything down to...nothing! Almost everything is all packed away...the house is almost empty except for a few essentials. All these changes have been a bit difficult for Tara but I have tried to keep her routine almost unchanged and I think that really helps her with adjusting. We are about to embark on a new part of our journey and it feels strangely exhilarating, tiring, sad and exciting all at once! Right now...mostly tiring! We are going to be staying in a hotel until our flight out to Ca next week and, even though I will have limited computer access, I will try to post regularly over here. I feel in my heart that this new road is going to lead to all sorts of wonderful blessings...friendships and adventures, opportunities for my art, new places to visit and explore and the most fantastic part of all...our little family will  be together again! I trust the journey...

(mixed media-Trusting the Journey)

Flowers and blessings...

 I had been feeling a little down these past few days; been having a little pity party for myself . Here's the messy truth...I am really not looking forward to this move at all. Okay...I am hating it! Not that I would want to live here in southern Va forever but...I love our home and all the personal touches I put into Tara's nursery and my garden etc. Also...there are just so many moving parts to this whole thing that it seems so overwhelming at times. Added to that...I have totally lost my voice and feel a bronchial cold coming on. So as you can see..I was having a pity party. But then...this morning the sun was out , we went to Panera bread and picked up a delicious turkey sandwich...stopped off at Trader Joes and snatched up some delicious Tomato and Roasted Red Pepper soup and a beautiful bouquet of flowers...

...and this afternoon...Tim had a beautiful bouquet of roses delivered to the door...to cheer me up!! I realise that I have so many blessing to count!  Who can be down with my little Tara giving me hugs and kisses, an abundance of flowers, soup, bread...and all of your well-wishes and kindness? Not me! I am thankful for my abundance of blessings. How about you?

 

                                                                           (roses from Tim)